Tuesday, February 28, 2006

Frankenstein bags himself a new bride

Somewhere Someday, over the rainbow threshold....

Thursday, February 23, 2006

Hot steamin' burnin' review

Toby: Did you know the Lord of the Rings is gay?

Bree: Beg your pardon?

Toby: There's this big black tower, right, and it points right at this huge burning vagina thing, and, like, its the symbol of ultimate evil...
and then Sam and Frodo have to go into this cave, and deposit their magic ring, into this hot streaming lava pit...
only at the last minute, Frodo can't perform, so Gollum bites off his finger. Gay.

That's from Transamerica.

Transamerica is the sort of movie I like: low budget; to satisfy my smug anti-capitalist ideals, just so long as it doesn't reflect in the movie's look, costumes, locations, props, cinematography, music.... and oh yes, acting.

I really enjoyed this film. Well, not the sort of enjoyment I might derieve from a Vin Diesel movie, spending an hour and a half looking for that new facial expression I heard hes got. Or watching Mallika Sherawat's clothes drop faster than Danish credibility in the Middle East.

Transamerica was most enjoyable. A delightfully offbeat story, and wonderfully understated performances. I don't mean understated like Sunny Deol's acting (which is trumped only by his wonderfully delicious dancing). Understated in the sense of good acting, but no screaming or major crying required. Honestly, how many performances like that are there?!

I give it two thumbs up. Way up.... and I have a silly grin on my face. I gotta see this one in the hall, just to see the reaction of the audience...

P.S: I was delighted to learn that Kevin Zegers, who plays Toby, was in one of my favourite episodes of The X-Files. He was a little boy who bears the Stigmata.

Plutonian pancakes

Many months back, When I was watching Batman Begins, I spent an awful lot of that time thinking Cillian Murphy was actually Winona Ryder in dude drag. Really really! I kid you not!

So, if you're like me, and been wondering what Cillian Murphy looks like in a wig and a dress, you should see Breakfast on Pluto.

It's a wonderfully quirky movie. Who knew Irish films could be like this?!

Something that did catch my eye (other than Ms. Murphy), was the music (OK, it caught my ear). The music is wonderfully upbeat, and not what I would have expected. There's a breeziness that intrigued me the entire movie.

Wednesday, February 22, 2006

Brief BBM update

It ain't right not to post something on the phenomena that Brokeback Mountain has become. Unfortunately, I haven't the time right now! If you can't change it, you got to stand it.

So till I do, here's something else to chew on: Brokeback has crossed $100 million in sales worldwide. The cost of making BBM was $14 million.

The shirts from the movie (yes, THOSE shirts...) were recently sold on ebay for a children's charity. The shirts went for $101,100.51.

Wednesday, February 15, 2006

Photo-op: Pissed off soldier


This soldier ant guards his colony of Weaver Ants from my prying eyes....

This colony is on a tree near my department, something I see everyday on my way to the tea shop. Can you believe the tea shop guy charges 2.5 bucks for a vada?!

Tuesday, February 14, 2006

The Bear, the Fairy, and the Closet


Apropos some recent comments over at the faineant solitudinarian, I bring you some wonderful news, and an insight straight from the horse's mouth.

Sir Ian McKellen received a Golden Bear lifetime achievement award at the Berlin Film Festival over the weekend and used the opportunity to talk about the challenges of being openly gay in Hollywood:

"It is very, very, very difficult for an American actor who wants a film career to be open about his sexuality. And even more difficult for a woman if she’s lesbian. It’s very distressing to me that that should be the case. It’s not true of actors on the other side of the American continent, on Broadway, where people are very at ease with being open and honest. But the film industry is very old fashioned in California. My own career in mainstream films really took off once I’d come out and said I was gay. And that’s the way it should be because Heath Ledger isn’t gay nor am I straight and yet I can play straight parts and he can successfully play gay men. It’ll fade away eventually.

I was warned by friends in the industry, particularly the American film industry, that my life was about to change. They knew I was going to be famous, seriously famous. Of course it’s always a part of an actor’s interest in his job that he might appeal to a very, very wide audience but in the theatre that can’t be the case. Those films have reached round the world. And that popularity has rubbed off on me. There is no country in the world I can safely be anonymous in.

I think to become extremely famous when you’re very young must be very daunting and very difficult to cope with and shouldn’t really be part of your life because you should be concentrating on the work and not on people’s reaction to your work."

Friday, February 10, 2006

Tuesday, February 07, 2006

Photo-op: Arachnophilia

This gianormous spider lives right down the hall from me.... how could I not put it here?

Monday, February 06, 2006

Photo-op: My Private plague


Locust on my phone antenna.

What next, frogs from the sky?

Sunday, February 05, 2006

I am Darkness

Saw a clip of the South Park Tom Cruise “come out of the closet” episode. Cracked me up.

For those who haven't heard about it, Tom Cruise locks himself in Stan's closet, and refuses to come out. This is followed by several dozen appeals for Tom Cruise to 'come out of the closet'. Even Nicole Kidman pitches in.

This episode was blocked from broadcast in the UK. Gosh darn.

I ask you, when did Tom get so kooky? I always thought of him fondly (!!!), and actually sat through some of his god-awful films just because it was Tom Cruise. I thought it was sweet that he was married to someone taller and talented (maybe more than him) in her own right. Who knew he likes 'em tall n' butch?!

The whole Katie Holmes business smells fishy. How long did they know each other? 3 months? You know how much that is in Thetan years? I don't buy the lovey-dovey stuff. The most romantic thing Tom ever told Katie was “It rubs the lotion on its skin or else it gets the hose again”.

The Turkey Baster jokes aside, I really feel sorry for that girl... and her alien babies. Her babies will unlock the portal to the Ogdru Jihad, paving the way for the return of Ron. E. Hubbard. Yikes!

The title of this post comes from the tagline of probably the first Tom Cruise film I saw, Legend. A demon seeks to create eternal night by destroying the last of the unicorns and marry the fairy princess.

















No, Tom's neither the Demon nor the Fairy princess. He's the forest boy, Jack, who aided by his elven allies, must beat off beat the demon before its too late.

Friday, February 03, 2006

Jet and Sahara

The recent acquisition of Air Sahara by Jet Airways has been discussed threadbare in the public domain, and there have been a lot of questions asked about its ramifications.

Coming from an Aviation family, this is an area that has always been close to my heart, and I’m bound to have an opinion on the matter.

For what it’s worth, the deal is heavily overpriced. Sahara is definitely not worth that much. Sahara doesn’t even own its planes, they’re leased. What Jet does acquire, however, is something less tangible. It gains over 200 pilots, and an array of ground staff. Sahara assets spread throughout the country are important. Sahara has hangers in places like Calcutta and Hyderabad, where Jet doesn’t. 60% of Jet flights originate and terminate at Mumbai, where most of Jet’s assets are concentrated.

Perhaps more important are the less tangible gains that Jet has made. Jet now dominates the Delhi-Mumbai sector, the most lucrative. Much of the traffic on this sector are dedicated business travellers, who can afford to travel on any airline they like, and are less likely to shift to budget airlines. Jet also gains Sahara’s code sharing rights to international Destination. This is an aspect that has been overlooked, perhaps. Code Sharing rights are hard to get, and many airlines routine club together to operate a single flight. Jet has been denied access to US skies, though it’s only a matter of time.

But I still wonder if all this was worth it. After all, Sahara was floundering. Profits were razor thin, and valuation of personnel is a difficult task. Sure, Pilots are tough to get. Last year Jet had to cancel flights because there weren’t enough pilots to go around. Sahara’s pilots are Boeing trained the same as Jet. This makes the pilots an immensely valuable resource. Training a pilot from scratch is immensely expensive. How expensive? Well, flying a commercial Jet requires a CPL (Commercial Pilot’s License), and training somebody up to that level costs well over 13-14 lakhs. As you can imagine, training to become a pilot is something most people can’t afford. Finding qualified, experienced pilots is harder still. Plus, they should be trained to fly the same kind of jets that you have. Acquiring pilots from Indian Airlines and Kingfisher is not possible, since they have Airbus Conversion. Retraining them for Boeing Conversion is too impractical.

Still, what does all this mean for the average flyer? A few weeks ago I travelled on Jet, Mumbai-Chennai-Madurai. Though it was nice to see smiling faces on Jet, I had my reservations. Most of the staff seemed younger than me, and I’m young! I’m not sure how they’d cope in an emergency situation. Experience really counts. Are they emotionally equipped to deal with a terrorist wielding a semi-automatic, or are they limited to handing me my aloo bondas? I dunno.

However, there are other things that kind of pissed me off about Jet. Throughout the flight, the guy sitting in front of me had his seat reclined, something that makes eating very difficult. If this had been Indian Airlines, a matronly Airhostess would have barked at him to keep his seat back upright…. But sadly, nothing of the sort happened here. But more importantly, it was shocking to see the lack of basic procedures. The girl sitting next to me (a child star from a recent bollywood film) and her mother kept fiddling with their Sony Ericsson 910. Now, admittedly, this phone has a flight mode, which makes it safe to use in flight. However, NO electronic devices may be used while taxing or descent, as it seriously screws up the sensitive navigational arrays. Twice during descent, the pilot had to announce over the PA to turn off all electronic devices. But none of the flight crew had the nerve to turn the lady to turn off her phone. Is this the great service Jet offers? Gee, I’ll be sure to remember that when we’re plummeting to Earth as a giant fireball.

Photo-op: Koliyalagam


From today, I begin a new segment called Photo-op. In this, I’ll post a new picture everyday from my life, along with an explanation. It could be anything, and there are no agendas planned. Given my life, it could very well be anything, and everything.

My first Photo-op is Koliyalagam.

It’s a sign I pass at least 4 times a day, on my way to the Department. For many years, the Planetarium on campus has lain vacant, and used to serve as a storehouse for old answer scripts. Within the last year, however, the Planetarium has been spruced up, and it is hoped it be restored to its full glory soon.

The restoration meant the sign was repaired and got a new coat of paint.

Thursday, February 02, 2006

Mega Update

Update time, folks.

Man, there's so much to say.

First off, Australia was great. The people are very hospitable, and the place is magnificent. Darwin has the tropical weather I'm used to, and it's scantily populated, thank God! Us Indians are just not used to seeing big broad roads with no traffic jam.

Traffic jam reminds me, what's with Bangalore lately? It seems to be rapidly deteriorating ever since I left. I know, you turn your back for two minutes and everything falls apart without you....

On a more serious note, the terrorist attack at IISc in Bangalore has had it's effect in Madurai too. According to the hushed whispers of people here, it seems Madurai was a possible target too. The very visible police deployment in Madurai doesn't bode well, either. The police have taken to stopping all vehicles passing the University and questioning them. It happened to me too. Or maybe they mistook me for a Kashmiri terrorist. Oh well. It won't be the first time the colour of my skin has gotten me into hot water here.

In other news, Brokeback Mountain scores 8 Oscar nominations, the highest of any film this year!! Yeee Haw! Bush claims not to have seen the film, though he's heard about it... he giggles, and tells people to go see it. The producer of BBM said in a recent interview that the White House requested for a print of the film and was sent one, though he has no idea who did see it.

My Oscar guesses? Glad you asked. BBM is gonna score Ang Lee Best Director. He deserves it. Best Actor is probably going to Capote, though it would be a hoot if BBM snags that as well. Best Actress? At this point, my guess is Transamerica. Notice I refer to the films scoring the awards, not the people? That's because I strongly believe each performance is unique, and is inextricably bound to the film. An actor may give a brilliant performance, but it's the film that gives him/her the opportunity to do so. It takes a film like BBM to extract rave performances from Heath Ledger and Jake G., both of whom had no serious acting credits till date. Now they're the toast of Hollywood. Funny, isn't it? A few years ago, BBM was the “greatest unproducable script”, and now, it's tearing open minds and hearts. As for acting skills, well, let's just say, does anybody remember Hoffman in a memorable role before Capote? Or any role, that they can remember? I have, and believe me, if he had talent then, it wasn't used. That's how it is. The film is bigger than just the sum of its actors.

Back to the Oscars. Best film? I hope BBM, but the SAG awards have thrown up a strong contender, Crash. BBM cleaned up at the Golden Globes, which tend to reward smaller, better made films than the glitz loving Oscars. However, Crash is a very LA film, and has strong Southern California roots, where most of the SAG voters live. Crash triumphed at the SAG awards, and BBM flopped. SAG voters make up the largest contingent of Academy voters. You do the math. The LA Weekly says that homophobia is keeping many straight Academy members from even screening Brokeback. Either way, let's see. If BBM triumphs at the Oscars, I'll commend their good judgement. If it fails, I'll lam bast their small minded, bourgeois redneck thinking.

But BBM has exceeded all expectations of it's financial returns. Made on a tiny budget of $ 14 million, its earnings per screen are the highest ever. Its popularity can only grow after the appearance of the cast on Oprah. Oprah's seal of approval means legions of Oprah's slaves zombies fans will now descend on their nearest cineplex in their millions. Each deranged fan brings their $$ with them. I commend Oprah for that. Her uneasiness with the subject matter is clear, but she's done more for this film than any wingnut neocon could hope to undo. Bravo, Oprah. Malcontent has the entire Oprah clip on his website. Check it out.